"Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much."
Working collaboratively with others can be challenging.
When collaborating:
- Have you felt that your ideas were ignored?
- Did you feel like you had to take over due to others not contributing equally?
- Were too many people on the team trying to take the lead?
- Did you struggle to identify mutually agreed upon goals?
What if you approached collaboration with a curiosity mindset?
Allow yourself to slow down.
- Sometimes when collaboratively brainstorming you may have several ideas and want to quicky share them. Take a deep breath, write down your thoughts, and then return to a perspective of curiosity.
- Be aware of the team's process and give other's ideas your full attention.
- Oftentimes, great goals come from combining ideas from different team members.
Ask for clarification when you feel left out.
Sometimes teams move at a pace that you are not accustomed to. Whether it be to slow or too fast. Kindly, state that you have a question about the process. Be mindful to own your confusion and not blame others for your needing clarification.
Offer your thoughts in a neutral way, being genuinely open to them not being pursued by the group.
- Engage in brainstorming with the team, without clinging to the need to feel validated.
- Do not take it personally if the group does not choose your idea or moves in a different direction.
- Be mindful that the ultimate good the team can do is the goal, and quite often that can take many different shapes.
Is being "right" or "having the last word" worth losing valuable partners?
Challenge your negative thoughts.
Collaboration can sometimes activate negative thoughts.
Examples might include:
- Self-criticism: "My idea was dumb, of course they didn't like it."
- Social comparison: "That team member is so much better than me, I don't even deserve to be on the team."
- Mindreading: "I know they think I'm too pushy."
Be mindful to treat others and yourself kindly.
Be willing to move forward or to gracefully step aside.
- Be open to feedback.
- Be flexible in your work process and your expected timeline.
- Know when to gently advocate for an issue and when to step aside and let others lead, for the good of the collaboration and the overall outcome.